" Pawlikowska's teaching"

Hello again! Times goes by and in a month's time there will be Christmas. Do you have any presents for your relatives? I don't. Not yet. Today, I want to speak my mind and say a few things about Pawlikowska. Her words are a turning point to me. It's striking that she has an impact on me. I start thinking about many things, about myself, about many mistakes. You are blind as long as you meet somebody who is wise enough to teach you. Pawlikowska is such a person to me. I realize that in fact, I don't think at all in my life, at least I sometimes think that I don't think the way she does. I'm so much influenced by pop culture, by models on the cover of magazines, by superficial beauty. I don't see what is true and what is not.
I'd like to quote Pawlikowska's words: "A man who regains self-trust, starts trusting other peole. When he gets rid of the fear of being hurt, he will learn how to show and get friendship. Then tormenting loneliness and pain will disappear." I must say that I sometimes think that I'm such a failure. I lost trust to myself, because I experienced disappointment so many times. However, the point is that I should look at my failures from a different perspective, because we shouldn't demand from life to be perfect, that we don't encounter any trouble. Nobody can assure us that everything is going to be all right. It's so hard to trust myself and it's true that I'm afraid of being with other people. Really, I don't feel like openening towards others. I feel such a blocade. Pawlikowska is such a brain washing to me, because in many aspects she is right.
Today, a piece of wisdom by P. Coelho:"Good and Evil have the same face. Everything depends on when they stand on our way of life."
Have a nice day, Ela.